Wally the Green Flamingo

Wally was the only flamingo among his flamingo friends who turned green instead of pink when sunburnt. His mother told him he was special, but even that falsehood couldn’t undo the damage of childhood teasing.

“Did your mother fuck Kermit the Frog?” they yelled in the flamingo sanctuary. 

“Kermit fucker, Kermit fucker, gangrene Kermit fucker.”

And that was the kindest stuff.

He tried to drink Kool-Aid (Tropical   Punch), but the Kool-Aid would only turn his middle feathers pink before they would fall out, shed, combust, and he would be green again.